ah! my #SAHM life, a hellacious comedy at times.

sarah christoph @sunlovey

Wondering why so many days of my #SAHM life are hellacious comedies. Note: comedies once retold, not during. #FML

(above was tweeted earlier today)

Let's see, I began my day with a clogged milk duct. Ouch x10,000,000. Attempted to remedy in shower (bag of marbles massage) & with baby (keep eating, L!). Nope, still painful and rock hard.

Off to story time in posh palm beach, 25 minute drive. No problem. Get there. Get baby in sling. Get to door of society of the four arts, see sign that says "no story time today - presidents day". Great.

Turn around to go back to car, run into another mommy I've me in my new baby-centric circles. She suggests we walk along intracoastal since we both drove so far to get there. Cool. Let me get my stroller. Transfer L from sling to stroller and off we go.

L hates stroller five minutes in. Wish i'd kept him in sling. Too late. Carrying 20 lbs baby and pushing stroller. P.S. its hot out. Fun. Walk is good despite. Get to vent with fellow nursing and anti-cry it out mommy.

Get back to car and spend a good 7 minutes getting all my sh!t back in car. Then decide to hit michaels on my way home since its close and baby seems in good spirits.

Park near a rogue shopping cart, set up said cart with shopping cart cover. It then rolls away as I turn to get baby out. Chase it down with baby on hip. Get baby in cart despite challenge of parking on semi-hill.

Inside... baby happy, fun stuff to look at everywhere. For like 8 minutes. Then baby screaming. Not typical of baby in a fun store. Should have known something was up. Picked him up & carried him through store and check out, then noticed a dreadful moisture on my shirt and hand, nope, not pee. And it's everywhere.

Awesome. My shirt is covered, as is his onesie. Get back to car, get stuff in car (purse, shopping cart cover, purchases, etc.) all whilst rubbing liquid poop into my shirt and his onesie even further. Then, rip off baby's onesie and my shirt. (Had tank on underneath. Don't fret.)

Baby screaming. Clean up and change baby, then feed baby in backseat to calm baby. Oh & duct situation still killing me. Head home for part 2 of this super fun Monday. Baby slept entire ride, which will likely jack up my efforts at a scheduled afternoon nap.

Yay! & happy monday to you, too.

#grrr

oh heck. i haven't posted this yet?! DIY XMAS ornaments for baby L

i told myself i'd be buying little L's "baby's 1st christmas" ornament this year, based upon the fact that these days folding a load of laundry and unloading the dishwasher in one day is an everest-size feat.

eff, i never ever wanted to join the ranks of other mommies who exasperatedly profess such, EFF. i suppose hating such so much seems to provide me with the little spurts of fiery energy (i was once so bloody full of) needed to tackle things like DIYing my sweet baby's 1st ornament.

thankfully L slept through the majority of my michael's trip, and when he did wake up he was enamored enough by the colorful shiny chaos that is a michael's craft store to refrain from a five alarm L melt down (yes, he still has these. my guess is, he will until he's seven or so). of course i acquired the goods for like THREE ornaments, i know not how to stop once on a roll...

anyway, a new friend i've made via la leche league came over with her adorable 11-month old and we got DIYing amidst juggling both babies between L's various distraction contraptions, our laps, etc. holy hell, not easy.

and her brilliant idea to capture each baby's hand print with glitter was a bit of a #fail on my end. L stamped his ornament with his fist mostly, but we made do... that's his cherished masterpiece below, abstract and glittery! i'll love it forever.
sure, the whole process was challenging, i ended up feeding L in one arm whilst trying to paint with the other at one point in hopes of silencing his waa waa's for just five more minutes. but as i said to my new mommy friend, 20 years from now we'll be incredibly fond and nostalgic about the little glittery baubles we set out to make and actually accomplished.
it's not too late loveys, get out to your area craft store and whip up something for your tree with the wee ones, 1st xmas or not. join me in the mess and madness that is the holiday season with a child. ;-) oh the memories...
p.s. the perfect little glitter hand print belongs to the 11-month old. maybe next year...